Revealed: your funniest Mother’s Day stories!

by Charlotte.Barnes on March 4, 2010

Mother's Day FlowersMother’s Day is just around the corner and it’s time to celebrate our mums while showering them with gifts and flowers.

We’ve been hearing your funniest Mother’s Day stories; they’ve been embarrassing, sweet and very funny.

The competition has now closed and we’ve chosen the three funniest entries. A huge thank you to everyone who entered – we’ve had a brilliant time reading your stories.

And the winners are…

Third place

Lucy who will receive:

Happy Mother’s Day Cupcakes

Mother's Day Cup Cakes

When I was about three years old my mum and I were visiting some friends. We were all getting ready to go out one morning and I was playing with their kids in the bedroom. We’d decided it would be a great idea to jump off their top bunk bed on to a pile of duvets and pillows on the floor below.

As I was the smallest, I launched myself off the top and nose-dived head first into the floor – totally missing the cushions! What was worse was that I cracked my forehead open and was getting blood everywhere.

Total panic ensued as the mums were in various states of getting ready to go out. I think they were frantically trying to get me to a hospital, but my mum was in a mad panic because she couldn’t find any knickers to put on anywhere – in the end we got in the car with mum knickerless!

It was only then that the other mum noticed that mum’s knickers has been on her head the whole time! She’d been using them as a makeshift hair band while putting on her make-up!

Obviously I was a bit preoccupied at the time with blood pouring down my face, but the moment has gone down in history!

Second place

H. Smith who will receive:

Mothers day Treat Tower

Mother's day Tower
My mum had just passed her driving test and got herself a little run around car. One freezing cold morning mum discovered the locks on her car were frozen solid, so she blew into the keyhole of the car door and her lips got stuck to the lock. A passer-by helped mum, but tried to keep a straight face!

First place

Rhoda who will receive:

The Extra Large Pink Radiance Hand-tied with a box of chocolates too!

Large Pink Radiance

Mum won’t be impressed with me telling everyone this, but if it wins her a prize I’m sure she will forgive me! Her mobile phone is registered in dad’s name, but seeing as he isn’t the best with such technology mum had to phone up the network to ask a question.

Thing is they wouldn’t talk to her because she wasn’t dad. So, embarrassingly, she called them back and put on what she classifies as a ‘man’s voice’. Oh dear, the embarrassment! They then replied: “I’m sorry madam but I don’t believe you are a man!”

If you like the prizes above and are looking for a special Mother’s Day gift then why not visit Interflora’s Mother’s Day Flowers and Gifts shop at Interflora.co.uk?


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Charlotte Barnes

Post category: Competitions, Story Competitions  

{ 76 comments… read them below or add one }

Rhoda 04 Mar 2010 at 3:57 pm

Mum wont be impressed by me telling everyone this, but if it wins her a prize I’m sure she will forgive me! Her mobile phone is registered in Dad’s name, but seeing as he isn’t the best with such technology Mum had to phone up the network to ask a question. Thing is they wouldn’t talk to her cause she wasn’t Dad. So…………..embarrassingly……….she called them back and put on what she classifies as a “man’s voice”. Oh dear the embarrassment. They then replied “I’m sorry madam but I don’t believe you are a man!!” I cannot tell you how much I laughed, found it hilarious!

Julie Henderson 04 Mar 2010 at 3:58 pm

When we were on holiday 2 years ago in Florida we had went to a large outdoor shopping Mall. After several pounds spent my mum felt peckish and entered what looked like a confectionary shop. A dog jumped up from behind the counter which my mum found strange as it was like a little bakery. She asked for a few of the dog shaped biscuits and then asked about a cup of coffee. The shop keeper looked stunned, laughed at her and then explained that it was a dog boutique lol

She has never to this day lived it down

Cher 04 Mar 2010 at 4:03 pm

My mum is a unique character! From her owning the dancefloor at every family occasion dancing to Barry White – My first, my last, my everything to her bravely battling breast cancer and getting run over and breaking her femur within the same month :O

The funniest anecdote is when she once sent me to pick up a chair she’d seen at a charity shop. She loves her bargains and scouring shops so I trudged along in my car to pick this up. I got there and told them my mum had reserved a chair and I was here to pick it up. They had no recollection of this but there was one chair in the corner (with a customer sat on it) they presumed must be it. They kicked off the customer and I took it home. When my mum came home that night she looked at the chair and said that looks very different to how it did in the shop? After sometime and deduction we realised.. She’d sent me to the wrong charity shop and Id stole their chair :O She made me take it back and apologise.. cringe.

Sharo 04 Mar 2010 at 4:07 pm

My mom has always been heavily involved in fund raising and when I was about 7 or 8 organised a family swimming Gala to raise money for a local youth unemployment group. We were all in the pool having fun and my dad kept messing about and ducking her under the water. She thought she would get him back , saw where he was standing and dived under the water and pretended to pull his trunks down. There was lots of shouting and water splashing and when she jumped up her laugh turned to puce embarassment because she has swam past dad and had grabbed hold of the local butcher instead. She was mortified and we were hysterical with laughter. Needless to say she has never been allowed to forget it.

Jan 04 Mar 2010 at 4:18 pm

My mum was always a master of improvisation while we were growing up. She organised a birthday party for my little sister, who’d never had friends round before. She realised there wasn’t any fizzy pop so she put alka seltzer in the orange squash! Needless to say my sister didn’t have any friends round again after that:-)

Lucy 04 Mar 2010 at 4:24 pm

When I was about 3 years old my mum and I were visiting some friends. We were all getting ready to go out one morning and I was playing with their kids in their bedroom. We’d decided it was a great idea to jump off their top bunk bed onto a pile of duvets and pillows on the floor below. Typically, as I was the smallest I launched myself off the top and nose dived head first into the floor – totally missing the cushions! What was worse was that I cracked my forehead open and was getting blood everywhere.

Total panic ensued as the mums were in various states of getting ready to go out. I think they were frantically trying to get me to a hospital but my mum was in a mad panic because she couldn’t find any knickers to put on anywhere – in the end we got in the car with mum knickerless. It was only then that the other mum noticed that mums knickers has been on her head the whole time! She’d been using them as a make shift hair band whilst putting on her make up!

Obviously I was a bit preoccupied at the time with blood pouring down my face but the moment has gone down in history!

Abby Bookham 04 Mar 2010 at 4:34 pm

When I was about 11 yrs old we were on holiday in Devon. It was the era of the Berni Inn so we went into Exeter to go for a meal at the Berni. You know the slipping on a banana joke – well my unfortunate Mum slipped on a banana skin – bad luck yes. However, she fell where a painter was painting a shop front and yes, slipped into the man and got covered in paint. He kindly tried to clean the paint off and handed us some terps to take home. We then proceeded to the Berni smelling like a family of drunks. Although this happened over 20 years ago it still keeps us laughing – the bad luck fairy had a fun day at my Mums expense.

michelle 04 Mar 2010 at 4:53 pm

Sorry in advance mum. Myself my mum and my sister had just come out of the cinema. We all needed the loo before we went home ( as you do ) So there we all are in the cubicle when my mum shouts out that she has no loo paper. Before i can pass her some under the door she shouts back “dont worry i,ve found some tissue in my handbag” As we are walking back to the car my mum begins to look very uncomfortable and starts to act a bit odd (no change there then) When asked what was wrong she bursts out laughing and informs us that the tissue she used back in the loo was in fact a menthol tissue – need i say more? Poor old mum!

Cecelia Allen 04 Mar 2010 at 4:55 pm

A few years I took Mum to have a passport photo taken. She struggled to get the seat the right height, and every time the camera flashed she was startled almost falling off the seat before the next flash. Mum was tired and so upset and cried because the photos made her look ugly. I cheered her up, took her home and said we’d have some better ones done another day. Shortly after returning to my house the phone rang. Mum said “dont worry about taking me for more photos, I’ve drawn on a nice beret and it looks ok now” She really thought she could still use it as an official passport photo.

bee 04 Mar 2010 at 5:15 pm

Me and mum had gone to the shops to get some supplies. We were driving home and other cars were beeping at her and waving their hands about…… she thought ooh how lovley ! People saying hello (as it was new years day) wishing her a happy new year. We go home got out of the car and realised mum had left her handbag , a loaf of bread and a dozen eggs on the top of her car ! And they all got there in one piece ! Oooops ! Silly sausage !

Sarah Pybus 04 Mar 2010 at 5:19 pm

My Mum suffers with osteoporosis and a double scholiosis of the spine and when she has a very bad flair up (usually once or twice a year) she can end up hospitalised and on strong morphine to control the pain.
Visiting her on one such occassion she was excitedly telling us that her bed looked out onto the helipad and he had seen a few emergencies brought in during her stay, as the morphine kicked in she started drifting off in her thoughts and then suddenly tried getting out of bed,grabbing my hand and promising me a ride in the helicopter!!
Another day we visited she was in a very bad mood as someone had stolen her pink wafer biscuits from bedside cupboard! They would be the same pink wafer biscuits that she had been handing out to all and sundry the previous evening whether they wanted them or not!
She is relatively normal when not in a morphine induced high!!

Jay Scales 04 Mar 2010 at 5:37 pm

A few weeks ago I told my elderly mum that one of my neighbours had brought a campervan home which was very noisy coming and going at all hours. She gave me a funny look, but didn’t say anything.

A few days later, we were shopping and she suddenly whispered ‘what do they do that’s so noisy?’ I couldn’t understand what she meant until she said ‘and how do you know it’s a Courtesan he’s brought home with him?’

Bless her!

kerri kelleher 04 Mar 2010 at 6:01 pm

KEZ..

My mommy is very funny she makes me laugh all the time, but, why does she tell me not to pick my nose and she does it all the time and wipes it on my nana sofa….She is Funny but I love Her she is the best mommy in the world. xxx

linda curtis 04 Mar 2010 at 6:04 pm

my mum finds it funny to start dacing really wildly every time music starts in a shop , once when she started i run round the other aisle, when she stopped she turned round to find all these strangers looking at her like she was a mad women , it was so hilarious …sadly it hasnt stopped her from doing it even those she is 70

kerri kelleher 04 Mar 2010 at 6:06 pm

im very happy.xxx

juliette morrison 04 Mar 2010 at 6:22 pm

when i was little my mum took me to a chinese restaurant. she was complaining to the waiter that the soup didnt taste very nice when he told her that it was a fingerbowl to wash her fingers. I have never forgotten it and whenever i go to a chinese restaurant it makes me chuckle

rosie 04 Mar 2010 at 6:39 pm

My mum can knit for England! Why was I the only one in class in home knits when machine knits were fashionable? On the other hand thank goodness she taught me how to knit as we have designer knitted articles of clothing at a fraction of the cost now!

kelly jones 04 Mar 2010 at 6:50 pm

I was getting married and My mum asked one of the holiday makers when she was due, she went red and said she wasn’t eeekkkk and ive done the same to a work colleague, we just don’t learn!

toniq 04 Mar 2010 at 6:51 pm

My mum! the original fruitloop!

Me and my brother bought her some headphones as she loved to listen to her radio as she drifted off to sleep, this worked well as my brother was able to get a good nights sleep and mum happily listened to her radio quietly.

Anyways, one saturday my brother (34)and mum(66) had been sniping, so she went off to bed in a sulk and locked her door, brother offered an apology and cup of tea to no avail, the door stayed firmly shut, later that evening he was awoken by the almightiest noise of a radio on full blast, he knocked on her door and asked her to turn it down! she couldn’t hear him over the din!

4 am after 5 hours of hammering at her door she opened her door, headphones on, she hadn’t plugged the daft things in had she!!!

kirstine meredith 04 Mar 2010 at 8:37 pm

Embarassing moments are normally few and far between.
Whether its dancing to ‘ Saturday Night’ or ‘The Dancing Queen’
Mum has a habit that we all now and love.
When she sings to the heavens high above.
X Factor is what she thinks shes got.
But I can promise you now that shes really not that hot!
Embarassing…… I would have it no other way.
Together always sharing this years and many other Mothers Days!

Tina Parnell 04 Mar 2010 at 9:05 pm

My mum gave her savings book to the cashier in the local building society not realising that she had left her little reminder about saving in the passbook. She only realised she had forgotten to remove the ‘Save me’ slip from her passbook when the police showed up at the door to ‘save her’!!!!!! There were some awkward questions asked that day!!!

So very embarrassing. How we laughed and laughed. And what a very conscientious cashier there was in the building society that day.

My mum is amazing. She deserves some lovely flowers as I have no idea how I would manage without her.

Tina

Jo Jones 04 Mar 2010 at 9:12 pm

We went to a really posh black tie event held in a marqee hosted by Dad’s boss. Mum looked fabulous in a long slinky dress. She had rather a lot to drink during the evening, so was quite merry by the time we were ready to leave. The male host escorted us to our vehicle, and complimented my Mum on how beautiful she looked. Mum looked him in the eye and said if she had known how cold it was going to be she would have worn some underwear!
It certainly made him chuckle, and has made lots of people laugh as we recount the tale (much to Mum’s embarrassment!)

Ryan clark 04 Mar 2010 at 9:55 pm

Going back a few years I was with my mum and dad and wee sister were on holiday at a caravan park
in the morning mum would be the last one to get out of bed and come straight through to the kitchen area to make breakfast for everyone.
But on one morning, she may have been
over tired because after giving everyone their plate she picked up the bottle of washing up liquid instead of ketchup and squeezed it over her sausages, after a rinse under boiling water they were edible.
Poor mum.

christine 04 Mar 2010 at 10:04 pm

One day, when my mum was about to go out shopping, she realised that she never had her false teeth in. She looked everywhere but couldn’t find them. She had me turn the whole house upside-down, but they were nowhere to be found. Because she would never leave the house without her teeth, she started to get really frustrated. She started shouting and accusing me of hiding the teeth. As she was screaming her head off, the teeth fell out of her trouser leg. How embarrassing! I’ll never let her forget it.

Shaun Wiltshire 04 Mar 2010 at 10:09 pm

One funny story that springs to mind is when Mum decided to have a go at riding my sister’s moped, after giving her instructions on how to correctly use the moped she went on her way, only problem being she had forgotten the lesson and accelerated too quickly, she then lost control of the moped and crashed through a hedge! Thankfully she was not harmed.

MARY MULLARKEY 05 Mar 2010 at 12:36 am

I treated my mum, many years back, to a night out in a londong restaraunt alond with my dad.
We all picked differet dish each to share amongst us.
Dale Winton was sitting on the next table, a very nice man
who acknowledge people.
Our food was delivered, which was fantastic, & in front of all
to see, my mum started to place her food on her plate! Or so she thought.
When in fact it wasn’t her plate, it was the table mat! The watress hadn’t bought
our plates over as yet. And of course our new friend dale winton though this was hilarious, and wanted to take her on one of his shows.
I was in aboslute tears pointing out to her what she had done, and my mum is one of these people who cannot stop laughting.
It ended up being a great evening though.

Stephanie Clough 05 Mar 2010 at 9:02 am

My mum’s not one to make too much of an effort getting dressed up when going out. But we were going for a meal for my birthday and she insisted on doing a full face of make up and wearing a smart trouser suit and some heels. My mum never wears heels! So we got off the tube at the station we needed and are on the way up the escalator when mum’s heel got stuck! I had to shout for someone to press the emergency stop button. And when we tried to pull her shoe free the heel snapped off. So we spent the first hour of our evening trawling around shops trying to find her a new pair of shoes, all the while she was hobbling about with only one heel on her shoes. Most hilarious birthday i’ve ever had.

Laura Illingworth 05 Mar 2010 at 12:19 pm

Mum was making mulled wine and mince pies for friends and had put spices cloves etc in the pan. They were all commenting that it smelt delicious but when it was ready she simply held the sieve over the sink and poured the whole lot down the drain!! She was left looking at a few spices in the sieve and everyone was crying with laughter! She said that she was so used to draining the veg she just did it without thinking!!

laura 05 Mar 2010 at 1:57 pm

my mum isnt jus my mum she is my best friend we live in a little town called rochford and everyone loves her she is a carer for my nan who is very ill but mum does her best too look after us all she is a beautiful lady great mum and a fantastic nan

Alison Eardley 05 Mar 2010 at 2:03 pm

A few weeks ago we were at my parents house, sat around eating a box of chocolates while looking at the photos of my sister’s recent ski trip via my mum and dad’s TV. My mum’s hearing was not great as she was suffering from a perforated eardrum, and hence was a little bit out of the conversation and speaking a little too loudly! The ski pictures were fantastic, but all of a sudden a random photo of my sister popped up on screen that had been taken at my wedding a few years back. She had been wearing a very pretty pink sundress. At that precise moment, my mum said (very loudly) – “Oh, actually that’s quite nice, it’s not too tarty at all”. My sister looked a little taken aback that my mum had, for all these years, thought her outfit ‘tarty’….until we looked around and realised that my mum had actually been referring to a raspberry cream she’d just eaten! The timing could not have been better…and we all burst out laughing…

ANJU NOTSOLUCKYBAG 05 Mar 2010 at 3:45 pm

My Mom went to visit the nurse with her feet. The nurse told Mom that she could buy some stuff to cure the painful hard skin on her feet, but it would cost a hundred pounds. Mom was absolutely distraught & complained bitterly that she would never be able to afford it. I racked my brains trying to think what this expensive cure for hard skin could be, but to no avail. Later on I was chatting about it to my husband, after a bit of thought he burst out laughing. He explained that the miracle cure was surgical spirit & the nurse had told Mom that it cost under a pound. Mom still wont admit that she’s deaf.

Georgia Horwell 05 Mar 2010 at 6:19 pm

My mum was always telling my dad it was like having a 3rd child living with him, at the time they were shopping in the Supermarket and he was on the search after some dairylea cheese slices!! .

“They are not just for kids” he said to her .. well anyway the next day he requests these sandwiches to take for his luch at work.

Mum had not bought these before didnt really know why he didnt want to eat “proper” cheese and huffed as she stuffed them into the sandwiches and sent dad off with a kiss to work.

At luchtime she received a phonecall from Dad thanking her very much for the sandwiches but said that they would have been much tastier had she taken the wrappers off the cheese slices.. well she laughed so much I think she nearly wet herself and it certainly gave the people in the office my dad worked in a grin for the day!

We love you mum !! Just the way you are….

lisa moorhouse 05 Mar 2010 at 6:25 pm

My mother and I were at a shopping center and passed by a store that sold a variety of sweets and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case,the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.Mum replied, “No, I’m just looking at your nuts.” I laughed hysterically.The boy grinned,and mum turned beetroot-red and walked away lol.

I would love for my wonderful amazing 73 year old mother to win one of the prizes.We recently found out my 48 year old sister has terminal bowel cancer,we are all devestated.But my sister is being so brave and strong.She is going through so much at the moment,and my mum,although being so upset has been with my sister and her family every day since we found out,helping her around the home and generaly just being there for everyone and spending as much time as possible with my sister (her daughter).She is amazing,a natural angel and one in a million and always has been throughout my childhood and now.I love her dearly xxx

H J Bowman 05 Mar 2010 at 11:13 pm

My mum went shopping one day a few years ago, picked up a basket in Woolworths and started filling it with her shopping. Next she walked out of the shop, along the High Street, into Boots and carried on shopping…. My mum was mortified when the lady at the till kindly explained that she could only take for the Boots shopping but had no idea where the other goods were from and that it wasn’t their basket! My mum has never run so fast down the High Street! She went back to Woolies and confessed…! Luckily, they found it as funny as we did.
Love my Mum x

Sovena Quick 06 Mar 2010 at 1:57 am

The one thing that still makes me laugh to this day thinking about it, It has to of been 20 years ago now. My mum was cooking our tea after school, me and my little sister was sat at the table waiting. Mum placed our tea infront of us then asked if we wanted tomato sauce. Yes please we both reply. Mum gets the sauce out the cupboard and gives it a good hard shake, well what mum didn’t know is the lid wasn’t on the sauce bottle properly. So off shot the lid and the whole kitchen was covered in tomato sauce, it was classic. Our kitchen units were white then and were completely covered in the sauce, even the ceiling had sauce on it. Me and my sister still really giggle about it now… oh and so does mum now, but oh she never laughed at the time.

Stuart Dunlop 06 Mar 2010 at 10:20 am

My Mummy –

I came into the world, just last year,
With great joy and many a tear.
For eight months now, I have grown
With many a cry, and a little moan.

I have thrown my food in every direction.
While Mummy looks for any protection.
My collection of nappies is growing fast.
But will my hobby ever last?

I sleep at any time I choose.
When I awake, Mum’s having a snooze!
She has large bags under her eyes,
Looking after me, it’s no surprise!

My mummy has seen this every day,
Yet her love has never gone astray.
I wish I could repay her everlasting love.
Maybe ‘Interflora’ can answer the above?

Lots of Love
Baby Kirsty Dunlop

Kelly Hirst 06 Mar 2010 at 1:13 pm

A few years back my mum decided to dye her hair herself at home. She bought a brown hair dye and went upstairs one evening to get started.

Around an hour later she came downstairs for the grand unveiling in front of myself and my brother. As she removed the towel we were expecting to see long locks of chestnut brown, however were shocked when we saw that her hair had turned to a pale shade of green. She was absolutely horrified and so quickly rang up the helpline number on the side of the pack. When she got through she said in a really serious voice: “I’ve just shown my new hair colour to my children and they said ‘Mum, your hair’s GREEN’ “. On hearing her say this we fell around laughing causing my mum and the helpline operator to start laughing too.

We were quickly dispatched off to the supermarket to get another dark dye, as she was too embarrassed to leave the house herself. We returned with the darkest brown that we could find which thankfully covered up the green completely.

Since then, she’s always had her hair dyed for her at the hairdressers.

Rose Horwell 06 Mar 2010 at 6:50 pm

Mum was always telling us about the neighbours busy goings on and on this occasion we were sitting in the front room eating and drinking tea..

“The neighbours” .. she started .. “apparently are having a new porch .. but I was told that ages ago and the builders havent even started on it”! ” I hope it doesnt mean a lot of builders vans for weeks” she said. Months went by .. no porch..

She mentioned it again a few months later and we realised that she had got the wrong end of the stick .. sitting on their drive was a new Porche!! .. bless her all this time she was worrying about builders and they had just mentioned they were having a new car to her!

Anthony 06 Mar 2010 at 7:31 pm

When I was nearly 4 Mum was 8 months pregnant with my baby brother. Throughtout her pregnancy she had told me all about the baby growing in her tummy and we’d looked at babies and things in the Mothercare catalogue. One morning, completely out of the blue whilst sitting at the at breakfast table, I asked her this question “Mum, when you have the baby do you have to take your tights off?” Mum and Dad immediately exploded into laughter and Mum’s cereal flew out of her mouth and all over the table.

Jaci 07 Mar 2010 at 2:15 pm

Oh my mum!!! Cancer, beat it twice!! Losing her sister to cancer – she’s surviving! Putting up with my dad – the worlds nearest example of real life victor meldrew – no bother to her!! She is AMAZING! She is a fighter, a mummy, a wife, sister and daughter. But she is also a great friend – to me and many others! She doesn’t see it herself which is almost unfair!! She is ditsy, caring and honest (sometimes too much) but she is, more than anything, a mother! Her life revolves around my brother and I and I think she derserves EVERYTHING!! She’s my inspiration! xx

Fay Wheeler 07 Mar 2010 at 3:11 pm

When I was a teenager I was clearing out some clothes that I didn’t want anymore. One item was a black ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle’ t-shirt with a bright green fluorescent logo on the front.
My mum, who is a secondary school teacher, was running late one morning and couldn’t find a top to wear under her jacket. She grabbed my discarded t-shirt and put it on backwards so that that only the plain black would be seen.
Unfortunately, she forgot about this later in the day when her classroom got a bit hot and she removed her jacket. She couldn’t understand how a previously well-behaved class turned into mayhem with hysterical laughter and shouts of ‘Cowabunga’ until she returned home and realised her mistake!
Luckily, the kids decided that she was a ‘dude’ for her bizarre fashion mistake but she still gets ribbed about it now from her colleagues and family.

Samantha Clarke 08 Mar 2010 at 1:10 am

I was about 6 years old and we were going to Flamingo land for the day. On the way there in the car, my older sister had a bag of chocolate truffles that she shared with us all, she leaned to pass one to our mum but dropped it down the back of her seat and didn’t say anything. When we got out of the car at Flamingo land, mum discovered that she had melted brown goo all over the back of her jeans and had to spend the day (it was a hot day) with her cardigan tied around her waist to cover it up!

Lucy 08 Mar 2010 at 11:46 am

My mum would KILL me if she knew I was sharing this but hey ho! lol 🙂

My dad is a big fan of his bike, and quite often he would drag my mother out for a long bike ride in the countryside. Dad is very fit and could cycle for hours and hours, but mum on the other hand, finds it quite hard work and tires quickly.

After a 10 mile ride through stratford in the sunshine, they decided to pull over by a local pub and stop for a well earned rest.

On stopping, my mum was so tired she “forgot” to put her leg out to stop herself and simply fell straight into the moat around the pub, in front of a large group of onlookers in the beer garden! She was very embarrased, but even more embarrased when a police car pulled over to check if she was ok!!! 🙂

Mum – we wouldnt have you any other way!! lol 🙂 x

Cotters 08 Mar 2010 at 11:50 am

My mum and modern technology dont mix, it took me a lifetime to teach her how to use a mobile phone and text, let alone get to grips with all the acroynms!

Last week her friend text her quite distraught telling her that he beloved collie had passed away. Mum was very sad for her – the dog had been part of their family for many years. Mum decided to text her back saying how sorry she was and wrote

“So sorry to hear about your dog. LOL”

She couldnt understand why her friend thought this was a bit weird! She thought that LOL was lots of love!!!!

Bless her

x

H N 08 Mar 2010 at 1:43 pm

My Mum provides the whole family with endless embarrassing moments and opportunities to giggle together.
My favourite must be the time she called the doctor’s to make an appointment.
The receptionist asked for her name and she said ‘Mrs. A. Forster’
The receptionist asked her what the A stood for and Mum replied ‘Apple’.
The receptionist asked her a few more times and Mum insisted that A stood for apple and was getting irritated until the receptionist said ‘I’m sure your name isn’t Apple Forster.’
My Mum burst out laughing, realising her mistake, and turned a lovely crimson shade as she popped into the Doctor’s for her appointment later that day and had to sign in with the receptionist.
Since then, every silly comment she makes is met with ‘Oh Apple!’ xxxx

wendy 08 Mar 2010 at 1:47 pm

My mum is a bit dappy & says & does odd things which is the family are known as Jillyisms!

A classic was that she asked my other half where he did his national service (even though he’s the same age as her son) he hasnt quite forgiven her!

She insists Avatar was in Black & white!

She’s made choclate custard with gravy, fruit pie with mince (as had taken labels of tins)

She is though my best mate and great fun.

Maria 08 Mar 2010 at 2:49 pm

So many things I could say about my Mum – we have heard about many of her capers especially when she was a training to be a nurse, this is my sons favorite story – whilst training to be a nurse she decided to learn to roller skate – there was a large long corridor, off she went not getting very far before landing in a heap – the Matron came along just at that moment “Nurse what are you doing” – my mum “learning to rollerskate” she was told in no uncertain terms that this was not the place to learn and to get up. It must have been like one of those Carry on moments as she struggled to get up legs and arms went flying the matron tried to help her up and also landed up falling over, Mums freind walked around the corner and just stood there howling with laughter (thats who told us her story that will continue for a long time)

Kimmy393 08 Mar 2010 at 5:19 pm

When I was younger and still in primary school, I remember my mum had called the school to tell us that she had been locked out of the house house and could not come get us from school. However her message got mixed up and we were told she had been “knocked out”. So a friends mum took my sister and I to her house and called around the hospitals to find out where she was. Everyone was so worried. My dad was contacted at work and evryone was trying to find out where she was. I remeber being so worried and crying so much that I thought my mum was hurt. Gosh was my mum embarressed when she had to come and collect use from her friends house, all that fuss that had been created. My mum was bright red HAHA

tracey rollings 08 Mar 2010 at 5:26 pm

at new year my mum held a little get together for me my sister and our families her favorite film is nanny mcfee and thats what my kids and nephews call her any way they were all watching it in the conservatory when my mum decided to dress up as her includign the black tooth but adding a green nose unfortunatly what she didnt realise is she used permenant marker and saw the new year in looking more like the wicked witch of the west the four grandkids and myself and my sister were just in hysterics i even managed to get a picture

zodie 08 Mar 2010 at 6:25 pm

As with most of these my mum would kill me if she knew i was telling people this, but my mum is clumsy, one day she decided to pull down our build in wardrobes my dad had told her to leave alone, we walked into the bedroom to find mum flat out on her back with a huge lump on her head! when she finally came around we found out that she was using a claw hammer and smacked herself right on the middle of her head, if this wasnt bad enough we went to my aunties bbq a few days later and my lovely mum who doesnt drink all that often get a little tipsy and made herself sick, just as my dad was rubbing her back the toilet seat fell on the bridge of her nose and made a cut all the way across it to match the lump on her head!

my mum makes me laugh all the time and quickly let me tell you of the time she was cleaning out her clothes she was convinced she could still fit into her jeans from years ago she could but she couldnt get them off, she got stuch in them and again it was up to dad to get her out.

Catherine Miller 08 Mar 2010 at 11:25 pm

It has always been fair to say my mum’s sense of direction has been a bit lacking but I will never forget the day I got inconclusive proof!

Fairly new to driving and having learnt in a different area I was feeling brave whilst driving Mum to Canterbury, Kent for a spot of shopping. She was very confident she knew where the car park with allocated disabled parking was so I followed her instructions. She was doing really well until we got to the back streets near to the Cathedral. It’s a left turn up here she instructed! I was somewhat confused as there were two left turns. So I asked which one, up there on the left mum repeated. As we drew closer I noticed both of the entrances were no entry. So I asked my mum again where to go. This time it came with useful hand signals, the left turn there Mum said as she waved her right hand to indicate!!! That would be a right then Mum!!!

Fortunately we got there safely even with Mum trying to get me to drive through no entry signs!

Christine Stephens 09 Mar 2010 at 12:29 am

My mum was always getting charity collectors at the door and donated every time but was getting a bit too fed up with it. One day a woman came asking if mum would like to donate to a battered wives home. “I better not”, said mum. “My husband will kill me!”

DEBBIE DAVIES 09 Mar 2010 at 10:45 am

We were on the bus many moons ago and as we got up to get off, the elastic went in my mothers knickers…….So she just took them off and popped them in her bag without a blink of an eye!xx

h.smith 09 Mar 2010 at 11:17 am

My mum had just past her driving test and got herself a little run around car. One freezing cold morning Mum discoverd the locks on her car were frozen solid so she blew into the keyhole of the car door and her lips got stuck to the lock. A passer by helped mum but tried to keep a straight face!

lindsey powles 09 Mar 2010 at 3:11 pm

When I was little my Mum used to be a cab driver, one day she got a job to collect some large pictures in glass frames from the local posh gallery. After great difficulty she managed to get them in the boot of her small car, she slammed down the boot and there was a very loud crash!! Lets just say My mum then had to explain what had happened to the art gallery!!

Alison 09 Mar 2010 at 3:52 pm

When we were little we used to go on holiday to Ireland. We stayed in a rented cottage. When we arrived at this one a lot of rubbish had been left behind so my mum decided to burn it as it smelt bad!. Unfortunately she did not realise that as it was Ireland the garden it was made of peat! You can imagine what happened! Luckily she managed to put it out before it got to serious

Kim Allen 09 Mar 2010 at 4:12 pm

My mum’s gonna hate me for telling this one but we still laugh over it and she might not see it anyway!lol One day not long after she’d got re-married I was round at hers talking about my new stepdad’s family, I was just asking questions and getting to know a bit about them. We got onto the topic of his twin brother and I dont know why but I asked her when his birthday is, she just looed at me straight in the face, looked a bit worried and said “Oh! I don’t know!” I started giggling straight away as I realised what she’d said but she didn’t for a minute or two but whenever she’s feeling a bit blue I can always cheer her up by asking her when it is again!

Katie Mackenzie 09 Mar 2010 at 4:13 pm

One day I wanted the paddling pool out, so off she goes and puts it all up for me, she wasn’t comming in so I decided…..mmm if I pull her skirt she’ll fall in, so I did….you see I wanted company but mum never saw it that way. Strangely….love you mummy xxxx

Louise Hollow 09 Mar 2010 at 4:21 pm

Where do I start with my mum – well she has embarrassed me so many times its untrue lol perhaps the worse occasion was when we were on holiday in Cyprus. It was out first full day so we went to attend the rep meeting at the poolside bar – we had barely been there two minutes when my mam said she had to go to the loo -she dashed back into the hotel only to return a couple of minutes later rather crossed legged squeaking that she needed the room card as the loo was closed for cleaning – 30 minutes later the meeting was over and she still hadn’t returned so I went up to the room and found her in the shower can you guess what happened? well she got into the lift along with a man and his young daughter who was in a wheelchair, the lifts in the hotel shall we say were a bit hitty missy – the left had stopped between floors and my mum had had an accident 🙂 Ok that was bad enough but for the rest of the holiday at every turn we ran into the man and his daughter – he kept winking at my mum and the little girl kept wafting her nose and going poooh 🙂 what else does she do well she sings along to music in shops, talks too loudly , passes wind far too frequently, and plays Wii Bowling like its the world championship. I wouldn’t change her for the world she has had a number of operation for her legs and hips (she is in hospital at the mo:() but she is still there for me 10000000% I have ME and get frustrated with my illness but no matter how much she is screamed it she is still there for me I don’t know where I would be without her she is my rock x

Sandy 09 Mar 2010 at 4:25 pm

When i was 19 (a few years ago now!) i was excited about my first trip abroad to Benidorm! But my friend dropped out at the last minute and my mum offered to go in her place, so, rather than lose the money i said i would go with her.
I was dreading it, i thought it would be really boring..WRONG! Away from my dad she let her hair down and was the life and soul. She got asked to dance more than me, she got chatted up more than me, and even on a donkey ride the men were all wolf whistling her and shouting ‘Hey Raquel Welsh!” I felt quite jealous and said “What about me?” to which one guy shouted “No you are Julie Andrews!”. Cheek. LOL
Despite the age difference we had a great time and since then i have been on many holidays with my mum and we laugh none stop. She is in her late 70’s now and hasn’t given up her passport yet… thank goodness!

Elizabeth Murray 09 Mar 2010 at 9:02 pm

My Mum is from Yugoslavia and has quite a strong accent and has trouble pronouncing some words, back in the day I was designing wedding dresses and asked her to ring up a company to order a “veil” … she ordered a WHALE!!!

HELEN DOLAN 09 Mar 2010 at 9:23 pm

My mum made me laugh so much one Christmas, she dressed up as mr bobbly and scared the kids next door and they were screaming, it was the funniest thing ever, then my mum fell over……..hehehehehe

Maria 09 Mar 2010 at 9:38 pm

When I was fifteen I was always running late for school making sure I look my best for the boy I fancied on the school bus. On this particular day I had spent a bit too long in the mirror and didn’t have time for breakfast so thought I’d best run to catch the bus. All my friends were at the bus stop and I can remember asking them if I looked okay and getting all exited about getting on the bus which was very soon to arrive with the boy I fancied. My friends all begun to laugh and point all of a sudden I could hear a familiar voice from across the road. When I looked around it was my mum in her funky pyjamas waving a piece of toast in the air shouting you haven’t had any breakfast. I felt so embarrassed and turned to ignore her as if I didn’t know her but my friends all knew it was my mum. The bus pulled up and I felt relief in the thought that there would be no way my mum could get across the road in time. Next thing as I got on the bus my mum ran along side it shouting my name and telling me to get my toast, the bus driver was in stitches laughing. The boy on the bus seen the whole thing, I wanted to cry. All those mornings trying to look my best were ruined in seconds. When I got home that evening I shouted at my mum telling her how embarrassed I was of her and can remember being quite nasty. Now I’m older I often think of things from other peoples prospective rather than my own like I did in my teenage years. My mum always thinks of her children before herself and must have felt embarrassed herself once she had realised she had ran out of the house in her pyjamas to make sure I got my breakfast!

Jacqueline Petty 09 Mar 2010 at 11:10 pm

Some time ago, my mum worked as an ambulance driver for Patient Transport Services. One day my mum and her co-worker collected a few elderly people from a day hospital in order to drop each of them off to their homes. They had all the patients details on their worksheet and went about their route accordingly. They pulled up outside an elderly lady’s flat, carried her up three flights of stairs, got her inside and helped her out of her coat and settled into a chair. As they were about to leave, the elderly gentleman sitting in the oppsite chair said “excuse me, this isn’t my wife, my wife doesn’t wear glasses”!!!

Jo M 10 Mar 2010 at 12:27 am

My Mum seems to be able to get away with anything……..many years ago she was out with her friend at a social club and on that particular evening they were holding a talent night. It was really busy and all seats were taken, then she spotted a couple of prime spare seats right in front of the stage so promptly dragged her friend over and sat there. An efficient looking person with a clipboard came over to her and said “You can’t sit there, these are judges seats.” “That’s right” said my Mum and smiled. Mr Efficient then apologised, smiled and gave my Mum and her friend their own clipboards to judge the show along with the rest of the official judges! To make matters worse, there she was pictured in the local paper that week helping to hand out the trophies!!

Annamarie Simpson 10 Mar 2010 at 10:05 am

My mum has very bad eyesight and we were once watching a programme about elephants with our whole family when she suddenly sat bold upright and exclaimed ‘That elephant has five legs!’. It was hilarious and the whole family fell about laughing, apart from our poor six year old niece who did not understand at all!!! We’ve never allowed her to forget it, since.

Cat Carroll 10 Mar 2010 at 12:11 pm

For my 18st, my mum decided to put on a garden party for me…
all was lovely, friends and family drinking, chatting, laughing. The day turned to night and being in a family of scots… we do all like a wee drink up! I was called in from the garden to get the phone. Was running towards the french doors… BAM… straight into them, chipping my tooth and splitting my lip. There was a lot of fuss over me and I asked my mum to do something to draw people’s attention away from my mashed up and slightly streaky mascara face. Five mins later, my wee mother turns up in my old school uniform, (brown with long kilt) with a beret and thick milk-bottle glasses at the end of her nose, basically looking like Jimmy Crankee and proceeds to get on the table and sing and do a wee jig to “Donald wears you’re troooosers”. Everyone was in fits at the sight of this wee Scottish woman in this slightly oversized kilt and she obviously went that one step further to flash my then boyfriend and friends her behind when she sang “…let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low, through the street in ma kilt i’ll go…”
Too far madre!! Did the job though…attention was on her! She actually would do anything for me…love her too much and she is bloody funny!!!

Anna Ingram 10 Mar 2010 at 1:00 pm

My Mum couldn’t find an email she thought she’d saved, so phoned me to ask whether it could have fallen out of the computer when she moved house!

H J 10 Mar 2010 at 1:01 pm

When I was about 14, I had an attack of the guilt and confessed every naughty thing I had ever done to her… and she didn’t believe me!!!

Dan 10 Mar 2010 at 1:11 pm

This is my mums mum but bless her the story is so funny that I hope its still ok. My nan was very deaf (almost completely deaf in fact) and was in hospital following a stroke. She always was proud of herself for never forgetting birthdays, and even when she wasnt able to go and get the cards herself, she would ask one of her daughters to collect the card for her so she could still sign it.

We were all sat around her bedside with her when she motioned to my mum to “come here” and went to whisper in her ear…. unfortunately nan forgot that her whispering was a lot lot louder than everyone elses and simply said at normal volume (if not slightly louder than normal volume!)

“Can you get a card for margaret and put £10 in”

Margaret was sat right next to us and heard it all, and we all had to smile and nod and pretend she hadnt heard! 🙂 Needless to say Margaret got her card and acted pleasantly surprised! 🙂

Always makes me smile to this day. RIP nan you are greatly missed.

Kelly 10 Mar 2010 at 1:14 pm

Well the list of funny stories is endless, but the one that we still laugh about is the time we went to McDonalds Drive Thru. The Drive Thru was empty so mum drove to past the first window because no one was there, then straight past the second window, again because no one was there. She stopped at the third window were you collect your order and the worked looked slightly confused because we haven’t placed an order. So my mum says “oh i’ll reverse back to the first window” the worked again had a confused look because the first window was round a corner. Anyway mum tried to reverse, found it was a little tricky so decided to drive all the way back round again. This time she placed the order etc, then when she was collecting the order she drove up to the window, slowed down but didn’t stop and took the order from the worker, with the car still moving. All i could do was laugh and be glad that it was not busy. Now everytime we go to McDonalds we replay the story and it still makes us laugh. I’m just hoping that there will not be a repeat.

Naomi Sharman 10 Mar 2010 at 1:15 pm

My mum is called annette, and because she has had so many hilarious moments we have nicknamed them ‘annie moments’, shes a classic!!
I had just finished my GCSE’s and she took me to the birmingham bullring shopping for a bit of retail theraphy after the exam stress. There was a woman standing infront of a big stall offering some food freebies, so i pulled her along as im not one to pass on free samples! My mum liked the freebie pistachio nuts, so we went to the stall to have a browse at what else they were selling. One of the male stall workers came over to us to ask if we needed any help and my mum replied ‘No thats, im just looking at your tasty nuts’. Ive never had to hold in laughing so much in my life! i just looked at my mother and we howled!! the worker walked away looking a little embarrased.
Oh my mother and her hilarious ‘annie’ moments, and i wouldnt have her any other way 🙂

Holly 10 Mar 2010 at 2:17 pm

My mum is always making hilarious mistakes, but this one particular time stands out to me as i dont think ive ever laughed so much in my life!
Me, mum, my dad and younger sister went to canada for the first time earlier this year with the rest of our closer family.
We were staying in a cosy log cabin and it was due to snow over night so we were all unpacking our thick coats and putting them onto the radiator for the day after, excited!
The following morning we were all dying to go out and play in the snow.
At breakfast my mum announced at the table ‘im disappointed, your uncle steve promised me 12 inches last night… and guess what, its only about 4 inches’, and she carried on munching her toast. All of us looked around at eachother and cracked up laughing, and my poor old grandpa sucked his milk up his nose, aha! we laughed for about a minute before mum realised what she said. We only then found out that this ’12 inches’ was infact snow, and uncle steve had told my mum after he had heard a weather report on the radio! We have never let her live that one down, haha.
Mum, silly mum, the best mum in the world, i love you with all of my heart xox

Ian 10 Mar 2010 at 2:24 pm

When I started primary school, two of us had identical pale blue hooded anoraks. Arriving harassed to pick me up one day, Mum took the hand of a blue anorak and was half way home before she realised it wasn’t me!

Amanda 10 Mar 2010 at 2:29 pm

My mum is my best friend ever, ive never met a woman who gives as much love as my mum does and if i could give her the world i would, i love you so much mum :).
I remember one day a few years ago she was going to a job interview, and there was a huge rush to get out of the door in the morning to the interview because she couldnt decide on what to wear. It was getting later and later, and she hadnt had anything to eat, so i gave her my cerial and she grabbed it in a flurry and said she’d eat it in the car on the way ‘ good luck!’ i shouted, and she said ‘thanksssss’, arms flailing as she ran down the drive way.
That afternoon, she arrived home, looking a little embarrased. I thought she hadnt got the job, so i said ‘better luck next time’, but she replied with ‘Oh – i got the job mandy! I just sat through whole interview with a rice crispie on my cheek!!!’…… we both laughed so much we cried!

Sara Mirza 10 Mar 2010 at 3:04 pm

Years ago, when my sisters and I were very little, my mum was in the flat while my dad was at work. She heard a stange sound, as if someone was scratching the front door. She went to the door and listened, and heard it again. She called out ‘Who’s there?’, but there was no reply, although she was sure there was someone there. The sound came again, and she called out again, but no one replied. She was really frightened, and hovered by the door for a long time listening, not sure what to do. Finally, the sound seemed to stop, and she summoned up her courage and put the chain on the front door, and opened it a crack and looked through…and saw a cat.

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